50 Shades of Grey

movies are cool. here is a place to talk about how cool they are. or maybe how much they suck, sometimes. like that fucking piece of shit 'mac and me'. worst fucking movie ever, a two-hour ad for fucking coca-cola.

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anarky
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby anarky » Fri Feb 20, 2015 11:26 am

I agree.

Not because I want to see Miley Cyrus nekkid, per se. (Though I do, to complete the "fallen from grace" angle.)

It's just that Lindsay Lohan already starred in a mediocre softcore porno, so this would be two former Disney kiddie stars doing so. Which would mean we'd be one step closer to a Christina Aguilera/Mandy Moore lesbian fuckfest movie, before both of them are too damned old and it would be icky.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby mabudon » Fri Feb 20, 2015 12:08 pm

the first 2 acts would have to be a typical teen sex comedy film, ideally genuinely hilarious, then the 3rd act would just be all of the characters finally hooking up , like the part that is usually over the credits telling how stuff ended up, only you get to see it
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby anarky » Fri Feb 20, 2015 1:34 pm

It would never happen because of the ratings boards and stuff, but it would be fucking awesome to sneak out some typical teenybopper romantic comedy with a hardcore sex scene about halfway through.

I don't mean "American Pie shows you Shannon Elizabeth's titties" (though that was nice). I mean truly hardcore.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby Diabolical » Fri Feb 20, 2015 1:38 pm

A modem Caligula.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby anarky » Fri Feb 20, 2015 2:10 pm

Except not shitty.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby mabudon » Sat Feb 21, 2015 11:07 am

I just got the fucking concept- the film will be called














The Pornicus
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby anarky » Sat Feb 21, 2015 11:56 am

You are a hero, sir.

But you owe JJ two bucks.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby mabudon » Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:28 pm

fuck man he can take all of the money as long as I gets me some beer, cos a fucking hollywood-backed Pornicus would really help many of us along
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby Diabolical » Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:45 pm

Every now and then I get the itch to design and draw what the Pornicus looks like.
I imagine Seuss-style meets Ron Jeremy.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby Ran » Sat Feb 21, 2015 6:13 pm

Diabolical wrote:Every now and then I get the itch to design and draw what the Pornicus looks like.
I imagine Seuss-style meets Ron Jeremy.

The thought of a Seuss-styled Ron Jeremy made me giggle for 5 minutes.

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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby jjreason » Sat Feb 21, 2015 6:54 pm

In my mind he's the most similar to Danny Devito's character in the animated Lorax. Except maybe with glasses from straining his eyes looking at all the, you know, porn.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby vynsane » Sat Feb 21, 2015 7:13 pm

^ animated Lorax design with DeVito's voice, but basically his character from "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia".
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby Diabolical » Sat Feb 21, 2015 9:29 pm

I almost mentioned devito in my post.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby anarky » Tue Apr 12, 2016 11:28 pm

BTW, this has been on HBO.

It's about the most unsexy naughty film I've seen bits of. And the acting is shit.

Danny Elfman, somewhat surprisingly, does the score, though. And it's not half bad. Hardly his best work, though.
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Postby Tom Foolery » Wed Apr 13, 2016 12:11 am

I watched the 'Everything wrong with...' YouTube video. It's basically the movie in just 15 minutes. That's all you need to see.
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